Making Fun Of Work

DO NOT READ THIS ARTICLE if you are a corporate manager, self-employed or a business motivational speaker. Corporate managers will learn tactics from this information that will make it harder for others to enjoy work. Self-employed people will probably not understand the humor, unless they too were once part of the corporate workforce. Lastly, if you're a motivational business speaker, you shouldn't read this because your time would be better spent brushing up your resumé and looking for another career.

Now that we've weeded out the people who shouldn't be reading this information, let's discuss who should: anyone who earns money doing something they wouldn't enjoy doing for free. Did that include you? I suspect most fit into that category, because that's the very nature of work as we've come to define it. I'm not speaking to the fortunate few getting paid for their artistic/creative pursuits. Those people probably shouldn't be reading this either, because they're about to be jealous of the newfound enjoyment you'll find at the office. Work isn't fun, but for almost everyone, it's necessary, and that's why I want to share this knowledge, for free!

The first thing you need to do is make sure you have a computer with an Internet connection. Without one, the options for you to pass the hours will be extremely limited to stuff that smells a lot like work. The next thing you need to do is find some victims. Usually, these will be coworkers, but don't be afraid to anonymously enlist the help of supervisors, vendors or even customers. In the game of work, there really aren't teams – there's you and everyone else. All are toiling away. The final item you need to prepare before launching project “corporate chaos” is a recently updated resumé. There's good reason to imagine that many of these suggestions will force you to look for a new job soon, but that's a small price to pay for getting paid to have fun.

Before we get into the details of your new humor habits at work, let's explore a brief history of working for the man. According to scholars, humankind spent its earliest days hunting and gathering. That means, no work = no food. It's pretty much the same now, but there's a lot more you can do between the lines of that “=” than you could back then. Next up, we had farming and agriculture, which allowed us to eat without the risk involved with killing dinner (before it killed you). Work was obviously still important during this period, but there was a little less pressure to perform. To say nothing of the fact that since there wasn't a manager pestering you for daily production reports, you would have enjoyed more time during the day. It wasn't long after farming became popular that someone had the bright idea to pay another person to do the work for him. The conversation may have gone like this, “Hey, buddy! If you'll plant the crops for me today and harvest them later, I'll give you something.” “Like what?” “I don't know … how about this stick?” “OK, sounds fair, I guess.” After this, there was no limit to how much work you could get another person to do for you, in exchange for something they didn't need. Now that you've hunted for a victim, gathered your equipment and learned about why you're in this mess, let's look at a few ideas for making fun of work.

Strategy 1: Perfection. Any time you have a chance to make your boss do your work, it's worth the effort. See how many times you can have a task demonstrated by your superior. Keep asking unusual questions about the process so that you appear to be focused getting it right. Most bosses are happy to demonstrate how proficient they are at doing your job, so let them. Over and over and over!

Strategy 2: Research. Almost any task can be done in a number of ways. Apparently skinning a cat was the first job with alternate approaches. Since your job is probably more complex than de-furring a feline, IT research may help you determine the most efficient method. Nothing looks better to a supervisor than you doing your homework and showing some initiative about your job. Here's where the Internet becomes invaluable. Can you spot the difference between randomly surfing websites and conducting a thorough Google search streamlining productivity for your job? Guess what: neither can your boss. In the time it takes to hear the door of your office open, you can easily close YouTube, leaving your other browser window displaying 2.4 million search returns. Make sure you go ahead and click down to page 20 in the results so that you can explain the past hour searching. Important note; If your company tracks your web usage, go ahead and find a new job, seriously. George Orwell thought it was a bad idea more than 60 years ago, and you should too.

Strategy 3: Pranks. Here's where those victims I told you about earlier will become important. A prank with no victim is like the tree falling in the woods. Neither of them is funny. There are so many good office pranks out there, it would be difficult for me to find the ones that would work best for you. However, if you'll refer to the previous strategy on research, I think you'll find what you need.

Strategy 4: Daydreaming. Honestly, how many hours of your life do you think are wasted on staring into space and letting your mind wander with no purpose? I doubt it's enough to cause a ripple in your company's bottom line, so go ahead. Spread some papers on your desk, or some tools under a car or whatever your actual work looks like. Then put your back to the door, point your eyes out the window and trip out! Try fantasizing about a vacation to a tropical island. Once you've spent 15-20 minutes on that topic, it doesn't really matter what else you decide to dream about.

Strategy 5: Don't work. Before you get all wound up yelling, “Well duh!” hear me out. I'm not saying you shouldn't earn an income to take care of responsibilities and provide for recreation. What I'm proposing is that you find a way to earn money doing something doesn't feel like work. Years ago, my mother told me, “Do what you love and the money will follow.” She was absolutely right (on this and so many other things). It's seldom an overnight transformation, but if you're diligent about discovering your passion and ensuring that others know about it, you'll soon find someone willing to trade you the proverbial stick for doing something they don't want to do. Especially when you'll do it so much better than they could, anyway!

On a sad but related note, approximately 6,600 people died in the United States on October 5th. It's the same number each day according to the U.S. Census bureau. Among the losses on this particular date was the co-founder of Apple Computers, Steve Jobs. Without too much aggrandizing of the issue, let me point out that if anyone embodied the spirit of pursuing your passion without worrying about the money, it was Mr. Jobs. Of Steve's many technical achievements, one stands out. Most of the people that learned of his passing, did so on devices that he created … Here's to the crazy ones!